In almost any kind of relationship, there are bound to be difficulties, and the amount of time that you’re willing to invest into dealing with them are proportional to your level of commitment. Sometimes people will leave at the first sign of trouble, never bothering to do the work necessary to fix the problems, and just taking the easy way out. They may even refuse to acknowledge their own fault in the situation, by blaming it all on something else.
I’ve now been involved with Jiu-Jitsu for almost six years, and it hasn’t always been easy. There have been times when I’ve felt like saying “Fuck this!” and walking away, but instead, I try to identify what’s causing the stress, and figure out how to deal with it. Even when I believe it’s caused by outside sources, I don’t usually seek the answers externally, I look inside, and then I try to correct the issues within myself, instead of giving up.
As someone who has been committed to the same man for twenty-four years, I’ve learned that “happily ever after” doesn’t just happen, you have to work on it. You need to be willing to face your own faults, and training BJJ is really no different. Sometimes you might want to quit instead of doing the work necessary to overcome the problems, but if you’re truly committed, then leaving is not really an option.
When I love someone or something, I accept that my expectations may not always be met, and I know I might have to deal with some heartache and pain, but the payoff is usually worth it. My daughter recently commented that I probably wouldn’t train Jiu-Jitsu if it was easy, and I agreed, because overcoming the challenges is what helps me grow, and keeps me coming back for more. A relationship typically deepens when it survives hardships, which can make the good times even more rewarding, and make all of the hard work worthwhile.
“Let’s, let’s stay together, loving you whether, whether
Times are good or bad, happy or sad.” -Al Green