I generally prefer to be by myself, and the damnable thing about Jiu-Jitsu is that you can’t do it alone! Sure, you can practice solo drills and work on your conditioning, but when it comes to really training, you need a partner.
Thankfully, the vast majority of the people who I’ve trained with throughout the years have been awesome, but that hasn’t always been the case. Occasionally there were people who would do things like slam submissions on without giving me enough time to tap, and even one person who didn’t let go right away when I did!
When that kind of thing occurs with students who are just beginning, I understand and I forgive them, because “they know not what they do”. The students who stick around usually figure out how to calm down and exhibit control, so those kind of incidents don’t occur.
I’m fully aware that “BJJ isn’t Jazzercise”, accidents happen, but some are preventable. I don’t think a day of training goes by that I don’t receive some kind of minor injury (or inflict one on someone myself!), but it’s been worse when I’ve had to grapple with people who weren’t being respectful. I’m not talking about things like “using size or strength against me”, because I expect that, to a point, as long as it’s not reckless. When I first started Jiu-Jitsu, I was babied by some of the people I rolled with, and I wouldn’t want that again, either!
In BJJ, “it takes two to make a thing go right”. Always have respect for your training partners, no matter who they are. Treat them like someone you care about, don’t let a lack of control put them in danger, or as Fuji says “If you break your toys, you won’t have anything to play with!”
“Don’t need friends that act like foes.” -Rob Base & DJ Easy Rock