Darth Mother

I am truly evil. Yesterday before Jiu-Jitsu class, I hit my own daughter with a deadly force brachial stun. Okay, that sounds even worse than it was! Let me explain…my nineteen year-old daughter Skyler (who is a Karate black belt), said she didn’t think I could effectively do a left hand shuto (“knife”) strike to the left side of her neck while standing in front of her, so of course I had to try it. She knew it was coming, and she was ready for it, but I hit her a little harder than I had intended. Too much time away from sparring class has apparently affected my control. I also didn’t take into account that since I was hitting her on the brachial artery with the side of my hand (as opposed to the back or palm), it is considered to be “deadly force”.

All your cookie are belong to us!

Anyone who doesn’t think brachial stuns are real should ask Skyler about that. Even though I hit her harder than I meant to, it was still less than fifty percent, and yet I almost put her lights out. Woe be to the bad guy I intentionally strike with full force! When Amy got there and we told her what happened, thankfully she didn’t arrest me (even though I gave a full confession). Later on in class, they also witnessed me sneak attack an off-duty LPD Jedi, and Skyler remarked that I wasn’t called “The Dark Ninja” for nothing. Then Amy decided that since I have now obviously fully embraced the dark side, from this day forward I shall be known as “Darth Gina”.

I’m making light of it, but I honestly feel terrible about what happened, it was bad judgment on my part. I’m glad it wasn’t even worse, and that she only ended up with a headache and a red mark on her neck. There’s no lasting damage, other than the psychological trauma (which I believe is more on my part than Skyler Skywalker’s). I must learn to control my own dark powers! I don’t really want to be evil, but you know…the dark side has cookies…

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