Dwight’s Army of Champions

I am a dork.  I train Karate, and a funky hybrid style of Jiu-Jitsu, therefore I am not cool.  I’m aware of this, and I am okay with it.  Before I started training I would make fun of the dedicated disciples wearing funny clothes and spouting esoteric wisdom, and now I have ironically become one of them.

Most martial arts contain a degree of dorkiness, but some are worse than others.  Kung Fu seems cooler than Karate to me, because their forms have names like “Eight Drunken Immortals”, and “Dueling Tiger”.  However, I think Wing Chun is dorkier than Karate, simply for the unfortunate similarity of the name to “Wang Chung”.  One martial art that is always undoubtedly, unquestionably, cool is Muay Thai.  Okay, I guess all of that bowing is a little dorky (please don’t knee me in the face).

So, I’m okay with my dorkitude, I just don’t understand, out of all the martial arts in the world, why do I have to train the same style of Karate as Dwight Shrute?  The only way I could become even less cool now is if I started doing Rex Kwan Do.

“[indicating his purple belt] This is not a toy, this is a message to the entire office so that everyone can see I can physically dominate them.” -Dwight K. Schrute

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5 comments on “Dwight’s Army of Champions

  1. "[indicating his purple belt] This is not a toy, this is a message to the entire office so that everyone can see I can physically dominate them." -Dwight Schrute———I have no idea who he is, but based on this quote I already want to make him eat some floor tiles.

  2. Lol! I bet you'll like this one too…"Women are like wolves. If you want a wolf, you have to trap it. You have to snare it. And then you have to tame it. Keep it happy. Care for it. Feed it. Lovingly, the way an animal deserves to be loved. And my animal deserves a lot of loving."

  3. LOL Rex Kwan Do! oh the parachute pants.I never watch The Office, but the clips I have seen of Dwight, including the one above, are freakin' hilarious! Thanks for the chuckle!

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