Loser Like Me

Are you a loser?I guess it’s a good thing that I’m okay with losing, because I seem to be pretty good at it. I think it’s obvious that I am competing for the learning and growth, and not for the win and the glory, because I keep losing, yet I still keep competing. I’m doing it to get better, not to prove how great I already am. I’m doing it to represent and inspire women in jiu-jitsu, not to gain some kind of personal validation.

It’s still a hard thing to continually bear. It’s difficult to not get down on yourself after suffering repeated losses. It isn’t easy to not let it get to you, to not let a loss define you. It would be easy to give up, to stop competing, and therefore stop getting my ego kicked in the face all the time. But I will not quit, I will not stop trying to improve, I will not let my losses stand in the way of my goals.

Just as you should not let your wins affect your ego, and go around thinking that you are The Shit, you should not let your losses make you think that you are shit. In both cases, you are not. There is always going to be someone who is better than you, and someone who is worse. On any given day and time you could be either one, and when it comes to your training, it doesn’t really matter which one you are. As long as the person you are really competing with is yourself, and you remember that the temporary thrill of victory is nothing compared to the long-term knowledge that you can gain from simply trying.

Winning is fun, but it’s not the most important thing you have to gain from competing, and it shouldn’t be your only benchmark of success. To compete and lose is a far more honorable and valuable thing than to not compete at all.


2 comments on “Loser Like Me

  1. My tournament fight record stands at 1-6 so far. My first three tournament brackets, I came in second in a two-person field, 4th in a 4-person field, and second in another 2-person field,respectively.The upside of this is that at this point, the pressure is off. There really ain't noplace to go but up, right? ;)I'm hoping that as I compete more, the nerves will fade some and I will get better. Of course-as Georgette just observed- as soon as one starts to climb on top of the stack, one tends to get promoted again and then you're once more chasing after women who have been doing this years longer than you have.

  2. Thanks for the support, Kitsune. Another part of the reason I'm competing is to help myself get over the fear and nerves, and each time it gets a little easier, so I've never really lost.

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